I fail.

I'm sorry, I really try to be a good blogger, I'm just not very good at it. I constantly get distracted by other things, but I have been inspired to try again- thanks to the wonderful blog of notebookdoodles! I discovered it after reading a friend's blog and just love it.
So, I'm going to start being a good blogger. I'm not making any promises though because, I'd hate to disappoint anyone. Then again, seeing as I do only have ONE follower...but, I do not want to disappoint that one follower. Just a side note: If you read my blog, do you mind following me? If you are a fellow blogger, you understand the great joy it is when you see you have a new follower.
I'll try my best to make my blog as interesting as possible, really I will. I'm even "revamping" it to attract people...that sounds a little odd, I'll admit. Also, I'm starting a 30 day one-month to live challenge, so starting tomorrow I'm going to be posting the new, exciting things I'm doing because I am living as if my days are numbered.

*Sigh*- Have you heard of formspring? I have. In fact, I've heard so much of it that I have one. I'm finding it to be not anything special and the reason for that is I've found myself being a little disappointed when I don't have any questions...isn't that terrible!? Okay, I'm now going to finish redoing my blog, go eat my Daddy's "johnny cake" (a.k.a. A HUGE HUSH PUPPY!), do homework, then play clarinet.

OH! And I'll take pictures of these things for your enjoyment! (:

ist es schläf?

I feel weird. From yesterday to today, I've had this empty feeling inside. I have no clue what it is, it's just...blah. I really cannot pin point it. I don't feel sad but at the same time, I don't feel happy either. For once in my life, I actually feel no emotions. Okay, that's a lie, I currently feel-dazed and somewhat confuzzled. This is just weird. I'm just empty and feel like I should be feeling something but I'm not. Maybe I'm just tired...

The past two nights I've had a terrible night's sleep. Another thing which I do not understand why.
To start off, I cannot fall asleep to begin with. Then, I fall asleep for little over and hour and then I wake up and once again cannot fall back to sleep. So, yes, I feel very tired.

I'm starting to think that this unemotional, empty feeling is caused by my lack of sleep...

YEAH.
let's go with that.

Until I have emotional fulfillment,
Bethany.

p.s.I left the 'joy' out of my name for today because of my lack of emotion.

JUST SAYING...
I MADE THE RIGHT DECISION GOING TO CONVENTION RATHER THAN THE MUSIC MAN...BECAUSE WE LIVE IN A SCREWED UP WORLD MY FRIEND....

I'LL HAVE MORE TO SAY LATER,
BETHANY JOY.

!)@*$#*%

Times like these, I really dislike teachers who plan WAY ahead...As you already know, I tried out for music man, after much negotiating and confusion in my head, well apparently the premiere for the music man is during German Convention-which I was planning on going to.
So, all today I had to decide which I was going to do... the musical? or convention?... After much contemplating and talking I decided to follow my heart and go with convention. For those of you who do not know what this "german convention" is, this is for you: This event is held at Florida's, Daytona Beach. It last three(?) days and is super great[so I've heard]. You go to this competition, I guess you could call it, and compete in two areas. I chose reading and poetry. It costs 165$, I know a little pricey, but apparently it is totally worth it. So I've decided to take part in this and that is my final decision. All I have to do now is tell Mrs. Orr/ Mrs. Pringle that I have already committed to German Convention and cannot take part in the musical...I only tried out to be an extra, so I hope they took me literally when I said "I just want to be an extra"... if not, that's not my problem!

Whew! On a little side note- I started my healthy eating/working out plan today, it went very well. Now I just have to continue this...did I mention convention was at Daytona BEACHHHHH?! Yes, I chose the right time to get in shape so I'll look smashing in a bathing suit, lol.
Well, I've satisfied my blogger needs for the night.

Until Tomorrow( yes tomorrow, as in the day after today!)

Bethany Joy

I bet you thought I had given up.

NOT THIS TIME! :) I needed to take a break from blogger for a few days because I was far too busy and exhausted. So just an overview-

Wed.- I was suppose to have my auditions at 5:30, but then I went to the drama room after school to double check my time, I wasn't going to go till 5:45 or later. Then, Mrs. Orr told me that I could go Thursday at four. So I decided that would be best.

Thrus.- MY AUDITION! Okay, I was so nervous. I could barely sleep or eat, even focus that entire day. I went at about 4:15. It went by so fast, or at least felt like it. The cold read wasn't that great, but I feel fairly confident about my song.

I don't have that much to say besides that. I found out Wednesday the full cast list, hopefully I'm included!

Until I have more to say,
Bethany Joy.

Call me crazy...

...but I'm trying out for Music Man tomorrow at 5:30 PM...!
This is the only time in my life do I hope that I will break a leg. This is all I can say because I have homework.

Until I have further new regarding my musicality!

Bethany Joy!

Oh Dramatic Bethany, where have you gone?

I feel like a nervous wreck-at this very moment there are two sides of Bethany being revealed. The first side- the dramatic, outspoken, Carpe Diem part of me! On the other hand- the side which is insecure and has no confidence what-so-ever. You might be wondering why I feel this way, and here's why. My school is going to be producing the musical "The Music Man" and boy, am I nervous! I can sing, I can act, and I can dance farely well, also-I'm a fast learner. The problem is I feel extremely nervous about getting up on stage and singing and dancing. I just have this inner fear that I will begin my audition and totally bomb it. So, I'm faced with the most important question there is- place it safe or take a risk? I could just let this great opportunity pass me by and yet again be a supporting member of the audience with opening night comes along,OR, I could audition giving myself to break through my shell and enjoy a great learning experience, whether or not I make it.

I know what you're thinking, why NOT try out? What is it going to hurt? You make it or you don't. The way I'm looking at it, auditioning can be seen this way. You know that thing you've always wanted to do- one guilty pleasure- but the only reason you've never done it is because of that gut feeling that you could be A)making a fool of yourself or B) committing a HUGE mistake! Then however, you see the people who did that one desire you wanted to do and all they reply about it is positive and zealous responses.

So now, I don't know what to do! It seems like a silly thing to stress over, I KNOW, I KNOW...but I'm just worried I'm making a huge mistake. That mistake could be not auditioning and letting it pass, or LETTING IT PASS and missing out on a great oppurtunity.

My sister who graduated years and years ago is telling me to do it. She tells me to go ahead and do it because when she was in school she never tried out and regrets it.
I'm beginning to lean more and more to the idea of just auditioning and trying my best. I will never know what will happen till it actually happens. So I just need to hope and try my best I suppose.

Any Comments? Questions? Suggestions?

Don't feel shy at all! I would be extremely grateful if to get responeses BEFORE I go and sign up for a time slot tomorrow...

Until I have more to say-(&&& trust me I will!)

Bethany Joy?

Introduction: Bethany Joy

This is not my first time on blogger, but I do feel I owe anyone who did not "attempt" to follow my previous blog an introduction (By attempt, I mean read the one or two blogs I would write maybe every three or four months). So this blog is my new beginning. I've seen from other authors(?) what a world of difference having a blog can make-and it's also 2010 I need to try something ;)

So Hello, I am who I am, but I go by Bethany. I prefer the name Bethany Joy because I think just plain Bethany is so unappealing. I'm at the age of discovery and changes, I won't be revealing my age to you but I'm almost positive you'll figure it out with time, ALSO- this is the internet, can't be too risky on who or who is not reading your blog. I like to sing, but I'm not very confident with my voice so I don't tend to do it publicly, by public I'm referring to people other than my family and my VERY close friends. I play clarinet in the concert season, for all of you who don't know when that is it starts in January and lasts till May depending on your circumstance or situation..blah,blah.., then when marching season comes along I play mellophone *if you don't know what it is look it up*

I would describe myself as passionate, but that has its positive and negative side affects. I am people person, I love being with people and I love making new friends, while still treasuring old ones. My family is very important to me and unlike most families in America today, we are extremely close. Just a fun fact, according to studies, the American parent on average spends three minutes a week total having a 'heart-to-heart' conversation with their child?! My sister and I laughed when our mom told us that and then I replied " There are only three minutes a week that we're not talking!"

There are times when I wish I lived somewhere else, the town I live in is small and does not have that much to do, just to give you an idea, when the weather man mentions my town's name on the forecast I tell everyone in my house haha. When I think about where I wish I could live, well, I'm torn really. I love North Carolina- the downtown areas, the creeks, the mountains, IT'S AMAZING! On the opposite, I'm a city girl. I was with my family coming back from an event in Orlando and we passed by the city, it was at night so of course, I was fascinated by the lights and the excitement. So this places me stuck where I am until I can decide which I love more. I suppose you could say this reflects my personality. I can be laid back and go with the flow, but then I also enjoy the whole idea of living in a city with all its bells and whistles. Yeah, so I'm a little bipolar?

So, that sums up me for now, just a little taste. Hopefully you like what you read and will continue on reading!

Until I have more to say,

Bethany Joy